Tuesday, March 8, 2016


Eleanor is now 14 months old, and growing up so incredibly fast right before our eyes. She's discovering her independence and explores her physical and mental limits everyday. She's starting to say a few words and is such an inquisitive little human. She's a very happy kid, but at first glance you'd never know haha because she very much feels out a situation and surroundings, carefully examining everyone around her, before she can feel comfortable. Kids are amazing, and Eleanor proves to me that children understand and take in so much more than what a lot of people give them credit for. She's already starting to learn about her emotions and her actions as responses to her feelings. We noticed her "fussing" our dog Baxter verrrrry similarly to the way her dear mother fusses him. So, Jesse and I have been really watching how we act around her and in general really. 

I also realized that I have to start thinking a lot about the legacy that I want to leave for my daughter in terms of my character but more specifically my lifestyle. I spend so much of my kid-free time (probably when I should be working) day to day on Instagram, online window shopping, reading fashion and lifestyle blogs, thinking about what we're going to eat, blah blah blah. Don't get me wrong, these are all things that are extremely significant in their own ways because I'm a firm believer in beauty even in the tiniest and seemingly insignificant things, but I feel like I can do more! I mean, clearly! So many of us can, really. 

Just today, researching the this year's presidential election made me realize how much of an impact I have the potential to make. I'm registered as an independent so I didn't get to vote in the LA primary election and I got super frustrated because I feel like if I had registered Democrat or Republican a long time ago I would've been able to take advantage of my privilege to vote for a candidate which I'm very recently (like 4 hours ago, I know I know, how irresponsible) pretty passionate about. Not overly passionate I suppose, since I won't divulge which candidate that is. Anyway, this is not a prompt to start talking politics or whether it was a good or bad decision to register the way I did. But, more specifically, this just got me thinking about doing my part, about service, making a difference, and doing more in general (including research on voting rules). haha 

Overall, I'm as happy as a clam. I'm married to the sweetest guy I know, we have the most amazing little girl, we love our pets like crazy, and are blessed with security and love from so many friends and family. So, what more can I ask for, right? 

For me, it's not so much about wanting more, but feeling more fulfilled and knowing that I'm leading a hearty example for Eleanor to follow. I want her to live compassionately and to yearn to help others and to make a difference and to find a way to make it happen. I guess really I want to live that way and I want to share it with her. Voting is so easy. Educating myself on the issues, also super easy. So, there's that. But what else?! Well, I want to dedicate my time to those in need. I want to make a difference in the lives of those who don't have the means to help themselves. I want to stop wasting time thinking about expensive vacations and expensive things for a new house. Instead I want to seek out opportunities to make a difference. I want to share kindness and love and compassion. I want to be less selfish and less lazy and make things happen.

I just watched this video of a young married couple who took a group of friends to Fiji to help build a school and provide daily essentials to a small village. They spent their time connecting and celebrating with the families all while helping to build a school and homes. Can you imagine how they must have felt leaving there? Proud to have served in such an awesome way, sad to imagine that not everyone in this beautiful world has availability to the luxuries (running water, electricity, plumbing, etc.) that we take for granted everyday, grateful for the health to be able to lend a helping hand, and blessed beyond measure knowing that their own daughter will grow up knowing what it is to serve. I could use an extra dose those feelings in my life! Not because I'm not grateful or proud, but to keep me grounded and focused on what really creates happiness.

I'm not by any means degrading the lifestyle I currently live because there's only so much a gal could do in any given day. I have to give myself credit for showering some days if we're being completely honest. But my goal for the next few years is to seek out opportunities for me and my little family to give more of ourselves to those who truly need it! 

all photos by Hanne Denys.